You Will Die If You Read This Blog!!

Snakes will kill you.

Spiders will kill you.

The sun will kill you.

The sea will kill you.

Too little water will kill you.

Too much water will kill you.

This is what we heard all day up in the Blue Mountains. Our guide was called Smokey, and he was a typical crocodile Dundee!! When we first got on the bus he started top tell us about the history of Australia, whilst this was interesting, the more interesting stories came later in the day. A typical story went along the lines of this:

 Back when I was a young boy, I was being a bit stupid and thought it would be a good idea to start poking a snake with a stick. Turns out this wasn’t such a clever idea! The snake was pissed off with this idiot poking him, so he bit me. I staggered back to my truck and had to drive over 200km to the nearest hospital. I had about 20 accidents along the way, fought off a killer raccoon, shot a crocodile in the face and helped a kangaroo give birth on the way to the hospital. I was in hospital for about 6 weeks and died several times. However I am now immune to snakes!! Snakes will not kill me, however if you get bit by a snake, you will die. You have no hope.

 And this was the general basis of all stories told during the day.

 The Blue Mountains themselves were absolutely amazing. The first place we went had a lookout which meant you could see the view for miles and miles. The haze above the trees was blue, hence the name blue mountains. It has something to do with the eucalyptus sap reacting with the air. We walked to a waterfall which was beautiful; however it was almost 500 steps down, which meant 500 steps up. That was hard work!! I have never been so scared of stairs after that!  

  Back onto the air conditioned bus for some lunch...mmmm food! We had make your own rolls, salad and pasta in a park. It was lovely but seemed weird that just out of these beautiful mountains was a normal place with people going about their daily lives. After this back into the bus we went to our next destination. This time it was a more gently stroll down-hill and a cable cart up hill.

 The whole day was lovely. I just can’t understand why I’m so tired all the time! First thing when I got on the bus I slept for 45 mins, then another half hour kip. And almost an hour on the way home. Even today I got up at midday-ish, have done nothing and cannot stop yawning! Crazy.

Anyways I’ve got a bag to pack...again!

Love me

xx